Dear AHHmazing Ones, I live by my motto, “Change your words. Change your life.” The words we choose to say and think matter. A lot. If we become more mindful of our words and thoughts, it will help change patterns of behaviors that no longer serve us.

When you write your affirmations, make sure the words are positive and written in the present tense. (As if they are already happening and true). Say them out loud, whisper them, write them down on post-it notes, sing them, think them, and most of all, live them.

I teach “Words Matter” workshops, have created many power sentences that work for me, and this is one of my favorites ...

“I speak my truth with clarity, strength and love.”

How did it become my favorite? While my mom was in the hospital, serious mistakes were being made. When I spoke to the doctor-in-charge, I wanted to be careful about my choice of words, and I wanted to be careful about the tone in my voice. I didn’t want to sound too nice and wimpy, and I didn’t want to sound too brash and angry.

I delivered my words with a tone and intention that came from my power belly, and I delivered my words with a tone and intention that came from my heart chakra.

The overworked doctor I had to speak with had a reputation for being brash, uncaring, and authoritarian. but for some reason, after he listened to my words and the way in which they were said, he nodded in agreement. He even managed to smile at me.

Hmm. What just happened? Despite the nurse’s warning to me of the contrary, speaking up to him was a piece of cake. Was the positive result just a lucky break? What if it hadn’t worked out? How would I have handled myself if he ignored me? Disrespected me? Walked away? Told me off?

Life Wisdom: Even if we communicate respectfully, it doesn’t always work, does it? There are no guarantees that we’ll receive a positive response in return. That’s life in real time.

When we plan what we’re going to say and practice our speech in the mirror, it works every time. In reality, our well-designed and well-intentioned communication may or may not work.

Even though there are no guarantees of a successful outcome, here are the most useful communication tips that often work for me, and maybe they’ll work for you, too …

Listen to the other person with an open heart. While you continue to stand in the backbone of your truth, do your best to hear the other person’s point of view as well.

Find a way to shift your mind and heart just a little more.

Avoid accusations, name calling, impatience, bullying, blame, and all “low road” approaches.

Brainstorm win-win solutions together.

Be willing to empathize and compromise.

Speak from a place of love and strength.

If you find yourself at an impasse, give yourself space. When the timing is right, you’ll know what to do.

Be at peace. You tried your best to communicate with truth, clarity, strength and love, and that’s all you can do is do your best, right?

Give yourself credit for trying to balance listening from your heart with speaking your truth. It’s a delicate dance, I know. I find that adding LOVE to the formula of speaking my truth with clarity and strength is a magic potion with magical results.

I might be feeling angry, but if I can find a way to use my anger energy as strength and also speak from a place of love and caring, it can have magical results.

Speaking from truth, clarity, strength and love can avoid confrontation and enhance cooperation, collaboration, empathy, compassion, and respect.

Come to think of it, “I speak my truth with clarity, strength AND love” can be a magic formula for peaceful conflict resolution, peace on earth, and peace within, too.

Until the next time, remember to take care of yourself. You are precious, you are the essence of love, and you are loved.

Cheryl Melody Baskin’s books and plays are available on Amazon and Goodreads.